Is Joan Crawford God?

As with many other things, we may owe many of our misconceptions about religion to Hollywood.
Last night I realised where we have been going wrong.
Forget wise fathers, forget Charlton Heston and think 'Mommy Dearest'.
Still puzzled?
Think Joan Crawford, speeding her tits off on dodgy dexedrine and wielding an axe.
Suddenly all that cranky advice in Leviticus about diet and mixed fibres makes more sense.
Now, repeat after me...
NO (WHACK!) WIRE (WHACK!) COATHANGERS!!!